Stuff and Things

Well, I've been shit at updating!

To be fair, stuff has happened but not that much of it is interesting, and some of it is downright depressing. Scholar and I are no more - that's pretty sad. But it became apparent that he didn't have enough time to really put into our relationship. I think sometimes people enter into polyamorous relationships without really considering them first. I believe I was his first poly relationship, and for a great deal of the duration of our time together he was looking for a second partner. I have my Beard, of course, and I don't think he was ever that comfortable with that. In part, I suspect, he is not really, when you get down to it, a poly person. I knew it was over - no matter what he said to the contrary - when he told me that he "would have to stop seeing me when he found someone to be mono with" (I paraphrase there a little). That was never how I saw our relationship. I would have happily gotten old with my Beard and Scholar and introduced them and let them be massive nerdlingers together; but it wasn't enough for him, and there isn't anything I can do about that.

Of course, it makes me sad, and it makes me angry that he just let things peter out rather than doing the decent thing and saying what was on his mind, but I have learned from it, and I really, truly wish him all the best.

In less depressing news, our little house is coming along really nicely now! Look at my gorgeous garden!

It's so lovely in the sunshine! Shame about the big burned patch in the middle but we're going to reseed that with grass and soon it'll be all verdant and lovely! At the end is going to be the 'country house garden' with the compost heap and the vegetable patch and my fruit bushes (I already have a gooseberry bush, a blackcurrant bush, strawberry plants and raspberry canes) and I shall build some kind of suspension frame so that I can have summer rope parties!

We've now painted both the upstairs rooms - the study is ivory and a gorgeous dark sagey green colour, and the bedroom is sandy brown and dark blue. Very pretty! Next we need to paint the front room and do the bathroom, then the kitchen gets ripped out and replaced with my lovely new one, and after that - we move in!!! I can't wait.

The other thing I did was get my new tattoo! Well, the line work at least. That was nearly an hour and a half, and the colour should be another four hours or so. It's looking really pretty but I can't wait to see it all coloured in. It's much bigger than I think I originally considered, but as it's on my back I don't really see it, so it doesn't worry me!

So there it is, in all it's glory! Pretty, ain't it? I honestly can't wait to see it coloured, although part of me wishes it was just being black and white. It's so delicate. I get weird about tattoos, though. After I get one done I usually freak out and get really upset about how I've defiled my body...and then love them. Every now and then I look at my feet, or see my back in the mirror, and say to myself "silly girl, what have you done?" but each one means something to me, and each one will always mean something, and that's all that matters.